And I'm Telling You I'm not...

Singing Love Potion # 9? My reaction: less than enthused. In fact I practically broke down and cried in the director's office of why I was being asked to prepare the mediocre 60's standard. Little did I know that Aimee Francis, the director of the upcoming showcase, was the one who suggested the song. She then went on to explain why she chose that particular song and for someone reason, with that, all my worry and frustration subsided. I'm starting to find that the industry doesn't find it necessary to provide reason to their decisions, at least not automatically. It then lies on us, the artist, to ask as many questions as possible in order to get the complete and clear picture. Aimee felt that "Love Potion" provided more opportunity for me to showcase my skills as an actor more than solely my vocal abilities. I was now willing to buy my ticket and thinking of climbing on board all simply because she had a purpose to this selection. It was foolish of me to react the way I did. I find that I am overly passionate and stubborn when it comes to the material I wish to perform.  I still strongly dislike the song, that has not changed, but now I see the benefits it will have in getting me seen as a silly and energetic character that might feed into the characters of Donkey in Shrek or Sonny in In the Heights.

Yet something was still wrong. As adamant as casting director, Geoff Golesson was in this song succeeding in the Showcase I just did not feel comfortable having that be THE song to showcase me or my talent. The song ISN'T me. I didn't chose it, I don't like it and it probably showcases 1/4th of what I can do vocally. I'm well aware that I have to trust these professionals, they are the eyes of the industry and they are looking our for what's best for me. However, I am equally as much apart of the equation as they are. I am the one who has guided me to this point in my life thus far. I have both taken advice and left it and that counts for something. After voicing my frustrations surrounding this decision many provided helpful and thoughtful advice. Some fed my anger in a supportive way and others put me at ease. The main frustration of mine is that Love Potion # 9 was probably the first and only suggestion made by the panel. I have been up for endless hours searching every song database, every youtube video and musical theater score to find a song that encompasses all the characteristics I wish to showcase on September 20th. It seems unfair that the panel can feel entitled to insist on Love Potion #9 when I'm the one who has done the extensive research. Of course they see things and know things that I have little knowledge of, but I DO KNOW that I have to feel good about what I'm presenting to the industry. I have to feel that I've given my fullest and best performance and no one, unfortunately, can decide if that has been accomplished, except me. It may be a risk against their better judgement but at the same time risks have to be taken in this industry. Big risks equal bigger results, good or bad, and still living through the passion that is Susan Blackwell, you have to go with the choice that physically stimulates you.

Now, each week we have a material class, in which we search for material that is suitable for the upcoming showcase. Every couple of weeks that material class becomes a panel of the Choreographer, the Producer, the Director of the showcase, the Director of the practicum and the casting directors who are helping us choose this material. At the panel we present the songs that we or they would like us to perform at the showcase. It is not a walk in the park. You use any time you have left in your week to make these songs as strong as possible and then present them to this team. The team is supportive but no matter how much you prepare yourself, hearing that they don't like something or that they like something you don't...the situation just becomes overwhelming. It is human nature to want to please and a human nature to want to be right and in that room none of those things ever seem to happen.

Well, the decision has been made. I will be singing Born on the Day Before Yesterday from the stage version of the Wiz.  Back in May we decided what our three buzz words were. A buzz word is something that we hope casting director's will perceive us as. It took me a little time to figure it out but, I came up with these three adjectives:  Proud, Ambitious and Pleasant. I think these are characteristics that I possess and exhibit without any phoniness or effort. And I think these characteristics are perfectly represented in my selected song. I feel guilty that I didn't chose Love Potion # 9. Even though I prepared and worked on it, I still feel like the panel is disappointed in me for not adhering to their advice. I mean, it isn't all that serious, life will go on, but I do truly respect their expertise and even their daily opinions. I hope they know that.

Now the mission is to find group songs. The team this year, after hearing feedback from the industry, has decided to showcase us secondarily in group songs rather than duets. So now we are on the hunt for potential songs that can be performed as a trio, quartet or even quintet. The search will be just as exhausting as the last, but bring it on! I'm excited to perform alongside some of these people! They are fun, non-judgemental and truly talented. We'll see what turns up. Excited?

                     “Never let the odds keep you from doing what you know in your heart you were meant to do.” — H. Jackson Brown, Jr.


~Michael-Anthony


P.S. A quintet is a group of five.